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The crude, the rude, the dumb dudes — this list has it all.First up, I’ve got to give the prize for the worst dating profile in the history of dating profiles to a guy who straight-up tells people they’re not going to like him.Reading on, however, it’s clear that this is not a stable or funny person.

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Hands down, the worst dating profile I’ve ever read was written by a law student who thought he knew the way to impress a woman. All this made me suspect that he sent his junk to a girl and gotten chewed out for it, which caused him to overcorrect. Like “Hey, look at me, I’ve never sexually assaulted anyone, aren’t I a catch? I do have to thank that guy, though, because his dic-pic fixation gave me a great story to tell my single friends.

He went on to reference his strict no-unsolicited-dic-pics policy twice more in his profile, and then he copy/pasted his personal claim to fame in his message to me.

“I’m so sick of being friendzoned,” he writes, which already isn’t going to gain a lot of sympathy from single women who are damn good friends.

Then he says, “Ladies, if you’re looking for a REAL MAN who will value you for your heart and not your body, your knight in shining armor awaits.” OK, not so bad, right? Wait, but then he adds: “No fatties, please,” and reveals himself for the hypocritical douchebag he is.

It’s hard to even laugh about this one because it’s so bad that it’s baffling. Ok Cupid’s open-ended questions sometimes get singles into trouble because they just can’t help but vent about their dating troubles and, in so doing, reveal exactly why they’re still single in the first place.